


let's meet in spring

by chasingjupiter



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Flower Shop, First Meetings, Florist Lee Jihoon | Woozi, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, Lee Jihoon | Woozi-centric, M/M, Misunderstandings, basically me ranting a lot about how much i love soonyoung, jihoon and jeonghan are brothers, jihoon blushes a lot, like maybe three lines of snwu
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-25
Updated: 2019-01-25
Packaged: 2019-10-15 20:40:25
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,819
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17535875
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chasingjupiter/pseuds/chasingjupiter
Summary: “You’re so whipped, Jihoon,” Seungkwan, who should be working at the moment but instead is playing games on his phone and watching Jihoon stammer, says gleefully from the back room.He buries his head in his hands, knowing Seungkwan is right but not wanting to admit it. “Shut up,” he whines.“Invite me to the wedding or you’re dead to me."(Jihoon is a disbelieving florist from a family of meet-cutes, but he somehow finds himself falling head-over-heels in love for Kwon Soonyoung.)





	let's meet in spring

**Author's Note:**

> \- not thoroughly proofread because i just finished writing it thirty minutes ago and i am sick of looking at this  
> \- title from han all's "let's meet in spring"  
> \- i tried to link a playlist but obviously it didn't work :) not really sure how ao3 works but! it's fiNe

It’s another normal Sunday for Lee Jihoon.

The sweet peas lining the window display are blooming nicely, as are the Grecian windflowers. His – or his parents’, but he likes to think of it as his own – modest, overgrown flower shop is humble but pleasant; the air is always sweet and spring-flavored, tinted with something a little heavier, like musk, or maybe Jihoon’s late-night thoughts left to manifest.

The bell hung above the door tinkles lightly as Jeonghan walks in.

“Why, if it isn’t my sweet little flower fairy! You’re so grown up now,” he gushes. “...or maybe you could do with some more growing. Just a suggestion.”

Jihoon scowls at his older brother and taps impatiently on the counter. “What are you doing here, Jeonghan?”

“Man, is it just me or is the customer service terrible here?”

Jeonghan is back from university for a week; for the past two days he’s been loitering around the neighborhood’s only cafe and fooling around with his boyfriend, occasionally stopping in to bother Jihoon. It’s usually better when Joshua comes with him.

“Do you want a bouquet or are you just here to be annoying?” Jihoon is about to brandish any random bunch of flowers at his brother at this point.

Jeonghan laughs brightly and steps up to the counter, resting his chin on his elbows. “I’d like a bouquet,” he says. “For Shua.”

Jihoon eyes him and huffs. “Your anniversary?”

“Yes, exactly. Please assemble your finest bouquet for the finest boyfriend.”

He picks out an assortment of pink spray roses, carnations, and asiatic lilies, adding in seeded eucalyptus and lemon leaves. It’s not one of his favorite bouquets, but Jeonghan and Joshua both adore these kinds of pastel pink arrangements.

“These are beautiful, Ji,” Jeonghan sighs, taking a deep whiff of the fragrant blossoms. “Your eye for flowers is so much better than mine. I’m glad you work here and not me.”

It had been a close one, to be honest. What had happened was that despite Jeonghan’s fervent protests, their parents had forced him to work in the shop, but the week that had resulted was so disastrous that they just gave up and encouraged his interests in other fields instead. Thus Jihoon was left in the position of inheriting the family business. It had been fortunate that he genuinely enjoyed the floral business, or the quaint shop would have been doomed. To this day, Jeonghan thanks him for saving him from certain catastrophe.

“So…” Jeonghan begins, leaning on the counter. “Have you met anyone yet?”

He considers playing dumb and pretending he doesn’t know the implications of Jeonghan’s question, but they both know he’s aware, so there’s no point, anyway.

“No, and I’m not interested in that, I told you.”

It’s tradition for the Lee family to meet their destined one in the flower shop. Having been passed down for the past three generations, Jihoon’s heard all about the romantic and cheesy meetings in this very alcove, tucked away in a narrow street of overflowing tourist-y goods.

His grandmother had met his grandfather when she had just opened the store, the tiles still a little dingy and the front step coated in dust. He had seen her bustling around the shop cheerfully, humming, and since the first time he’d heard her voice, he had been infatuated. Or so they claim.

As for his parents, his father had stepped back in after a run of errands to find a girl breathing deeply by the viscarias, eyes closed in bliss. He had asked her if she knew what they meant, and at the confused shake of her head, he offered his hand and asked her to dance.

And just last year, during Jeonghan’s unsuccessful attempt of taking over, Joshua had walked in for a photography project. For them, it had taken a few more days of subtle flirting and stares until Jeonghan asked Joshua out. (The most cringe-worthy part, to Jihoon, was when Joshua bashfully showed Jeonghan his collection of photos of the older boy, saying shyly that he was the true flower.)

Just thinking about it all makes him shudder.

There’s nothing wrong with their meet-cutes, but with all the pointed looks and whispers from his overly romantic family, he’s going to lose it. He can’t picture himself in any of those situations; he can’t see himself falling for any of the trite words or greasy pick-up lines. It’s just… improbable. Not just his  _ reaction _ , but who in their right mind would try those on someone like him?

Jeonghan looks at him skeptically and takes the bouquet, sliding a few bills across the counter. “Well, I’ve got to go meet Shua. I won’t be back home until after twelve, probably, so don’t wait up!”

“Not like we would otherwise,” Jihoon mutters. His brother gasps and swivels around, mumbling an offended “this is so rude” under his breath as he departs.

Without Jeonghan, the shop goes back to being quiet, save for the muted taps of the leaky faucet and the hum of the streets. Jihoon sighs and sits back down on the wobbly stool, checking his phone absently.

“Good morning!”

He looks up and meets eyes with the newcomer sporting faded pink hair. It matches his pink mouth, spread wide in a smile.

“Hi, how can I help you?” Jihoon goes for his usual customer service smile. It feels awfully fake, especially in comparison to the stranger’s.

“Do you have any bouquets for ill mothers?” The man smiles again, pleasant and light, and Jihoon nods.

“A get-well bouquet? Do you have any preferences for the flowers?”

He considers it briefly before piping up. “Sunflowers would be nice!”

“Okay, sunflowers it is.”

He shows the man the many assortments of sunflower bouquets, hand hesitating over a particular one with additions of mini carnations and daisies.

“Is that your favorite?” he asks, pointing to the one Jihoon is hovering by.

“Yes,” he replies shortly.

The man’s eyes light up even more. “Then I’ll have that one!” he says brightly.

As he’s ringing up the bouquet, he can feel the man’s eyes linger on him. It doesn’t… annoy him, like it usually does when people look at him, which is surprising. When he stands back up, the man beams and takes the bouquet with both hands.

“Thank you so much!” he pauses and looks at Jihoon’s name-tag pinned hastily to his apron, adding softly, “Thank you, Jihoon.”

“Uh… you’re welcome, I guess.”

As he darts out of the shop, Jihoon realizes with a sinking feeling in his gut that he didn’t even bother to ask for his name.

  
  


“Seokmin, if you don’t get your ass off of my counter in the next seventeen seconds, I’m going to castrate you.”

“If you wanted to get into my pants, you could’ve just asked!” he yelps, hopping off the counter as Jihoon makes a threatening gesture. 

The bell tinkles and Seokmin brightens, running towards the newcomer with open arms. “Soonie! What are you doing here?”

“I’m here for a bouquet,” a familiar pink-haired man says. “Hi, Jihoon!”

“Hi,” Jihoon mumbles. Seokmin had called him “Soonie,” hadn’t he? Interesting. “How can I help you?”

“Oh, um, my mom really appreciated the flowers from last time,” he stammers. “But she wants to be surprised… do you have any more get-well bouquets?”

“Yeah, sure,” Jihoon says easily, scanning the multitudes of flowers. “Hmm… I would suggest the tulips, over there.” He points at the corner of colorful tulips.

“Thanks!” He bounds over to them, bending over to pore over the blooms.

Seokmin shoots a shifty look at Jihoon from the sides of his eyes. “Jihoon, I think you’re blushing a little,” he remarks casually, peering carefully at him. “And your ears are really red.”

“Shut up, Seokmin,” Jihoon hisses, putting his hands over his ears. Sure enough, they’re hot to the touch, probably bright red. “It’s humid in here.”

“Sure, hyung.” He smiles knowingly and bids goodbye to “Soonie,” giving Jihoon one last obnoxious wink.

Jihoon watches – in a not creepy way, thank you very much – as he deliberates over the options, making soft noises as he considers them. He’s like a puppy, Jihoon thinks, noting the concentrated pout and focused eyes. When he turns around, bouquet in hands, Jihoon jumps, clearing his throat awkwardly.

“Is this okay?”

“Yeah, it’s very okay,” Jihoon says. “Uh, better than very okay. Good eye. I like that one.”

“Thanks!” he says happily, cheeks bunching up as he smiles. It’s cute.  _ He’s  _ cute.

Jihoon tries hard to not make eye contact as he rings up the bouquet, murmuring the total and sliding the bills into the dingy cash register. He can feel the man’s eyes follow his hands, and he suddenly feels self-conscious about his rather pale, bony fingers.

His breathing sounds cacophonic in his ears though he tries to assure himself it’s just normal inhaling and exhaling, but his chest feels stifled and tight and it’s all got something to do with one very cute, very good-looking, pink-haired customer.

He gives Jihoon a shy smile as he turns to leave when Jihoon blurts out, “Wait! What’s your name?”

The man turns around, eyes curved into pretty crescents. “Kwon Soonyoung! Nice to meet you!”

Jihoon feels the corners of his lips lift involuntarily as he watches Soonyoung mount his light blue bicycle and pedal away.

 

It takes a few weeks for them to fall into a routine, and Jihoon thinks he really doesn’t mind the weekly visits from Soonyoung.

“Good morning, Jihoonie!”

“Morning, Soonyoung,” Jihoon says, looking up at him with what Seokmin claims are “literal heart eyes.” He definitely does not.

(He definitely does.)

“Surprise me!” He says this like he doesn’t every week. Jihoon had been worried that he would run out of interesting bouquets, but he’s been mixing and matching his own flowers for Soonyoung, playing with different colors and flowers. He’s recently been dabbling in flower language, too.

Today the bouquet he presents to Soonyoung is an arrangement of pink camellias, daffodils, and Queen Anne’s Lace. 

“How is your mother?” Jihoon asks, handing him the flowers.

“She’s doing well, thanks! She really likes the flowers.”

“It’s nice of you to send them every week.” 

Soonyoung smiles bashfully. “It’s nice of you to make a new bouquet every week.”

“It’s nice of you to give us business every Sunday.” Jihoon replies as smoothly as possible.

“Well, it’s nice of you… it’s nice of you to exist! Take that.”

He can feel the heat crawling up his neck already.  _ For God’s sake, get yourself together, _ Jihoon thinks furiously.  _ It was a benign compliment! _

“Uh… thanks? It’s nice of you to exist, too.”

He smiles, lovely and wide. “You’re welcome. See you next week, Jihoonie.”

The way he’s looking at Jihoon… he thinks he could melt.

 

“You’re so whipped, Jihoon,” Seungkwan, who  _ should  _ be working at the moment but instead is playing games on his phone and watching Jihoon stammer, says gleefully from the back room.

He buries his head in his hands, knowing Seungkwan is right but not wanting to admit it. “Shut up,” he whines.

“Invite me to the wedding or you’re dead to me.”

Jihoon may be dumb and blind to the world at times, but the one thing he does know is when he has a crush on someone, and now is one of those times. There’s a lot in his affection for Soonyoung – weakness for his cute pouts, admiration for his dedication, curiosity for the rest of his life, and more – and there’s a lot  _ of  _ affection for Soonyoung.

It had surprised him the first time. He’d been giggling at something Jihoon said, and suddenly Jihoon was overcome with the urge to squeeze Soonyoung’s cheeks and pat his head and maybe kiss his cute little nose. Which was bad. Feelings were bad. He should have known by now, should have learned his lesson.

But he hadn’t. Whatever Soonyoung was doing to him… Jihoon couldn’t help but let the warm pool of fondness fester into what had become desire, or a full blown-out  _ crush _ .

And now, here he was, collapsing into his arms because of the way Soonyoung had looked at him. Even for Jihoon’s state of infatuation, it was a bit much, but there was this heat swelling in the pits of his stomach, and his cheeks felt a little tired from smiling so much, and oh, if Jihoon didn’t adore this feeling!

 

\- x -

 

The familiar call of the bell rouses Jihoon from his sleep-deprived state.

“Good morning, how can I help you… oh. Hi, Soonyoung.”

The taller boy’s hair has been dyed back to black – about time, the roots were starting to show – and he’s wearing a loose, very soft-looking hoodie. And, on second inspection, his shoulder has a strange lump on it. Is that an  _ arm _ ?

It is in fact an arm, Jihoon discovers, and its owner is a handsome, glasses-bearing man with a head of dark wavy hair.

“Hi, Jihoonie!” Soonyoung waves enthusiastically and Jihoon waves back weakly, distracted by the taller man with him. He catches Jihoon’s wandering eyes and points to his friend. “Oh, him? That’s just Wonwoo. Wonwoo, this is Jihoonie.”

Wonwoo looks at him – holy shit, his eyes are piercing and darker than his hair and  _ why  _ does Jihoon feel like he’s being scrutinized? – and his pursed lips break into a small smile. “Hi,  _ Jihoonie _ , Soonyoung’s told me all about you.”

“Just call me Jihoon,” he says, embarrassed, shooting a glare devoid of heat to Soonyoung, who looks away and pretends not to notice Jihoon’s glower.

Wonwoo laughs and shrugs, tucking his hands into his sweatpant pockets. “Sure,” he concedes easily. “Nice to finally meet you, Jihoon.”

“And you,” Jihoon mumbles. He has no idea who Wonwoo is. Who is he to come into his flower shop with his nonchalant attitude, and his thin silver glasses, and his arm around Soonyoung? And why does he already seem to know about Jihoon?

Jihoon has a lot of questions… none of which he will ask, obviously.

Soonyoung bounds up to the counter and peers at Jihoon. “Do you have a new bouquet for me today, Jihoonie?”

“Uh, yeah,” he says, mind still occupied. “Hold on, I’ll go get it.”

He shuffles to the back and gathers up the lovely assortment of acacia and variegated tulips, cautious of the sleek yellow ribbon he’d tied around the jar. When he steps out of the back room, eyes navigating through the blossoms and leaves, he watches Soonyoung playfully slap Wonwoo’s arm, giggling.

“Wonu, really, I love you, but you can be such a pain in the ass sometimes!”

Jihoon can practically feel his heart drop from its cozy spot in his ribcage, coddled with delusions of crushes and love. Of  _ course  _ he would have a boyfriend. Soonyoung was genuine and cheerful and beautiful, it would be shocking if he didn’t.

The jar starts to slip from the sweat clinging to his palms, and he hurries up to set them down on the counter.

“Here, Soonyoung,” he says quietly, looking resolutely at the flowers. He’d taken special care to look up the meanings in the flower meanings book Jeonghan had gifted him, and now his efforts just seemed to mock him as he focused on a tulip.

He finally looks over and beams at Jihoon, bending in to breathe in the fragrance. “Thank you, Jihoonie! These are so beautiful,” he gushes.

Wonwoo stands behind him and places a hand on Soonyoung’s shoulder. “Yeah, thanks, Jihoon, you really have an eye for flowers. They’re perfect.”

The protective hand on Soonyoung’s shoulder makes him bristle a little and he punches in the numbers into the cash register with a little more force than necessary. “Thank you, that’ll be fourteen ninety-nine,” he says in a monotone voice. 

“Are you okay?” Soonyoung leans in close and stares at Jihoon as if he’s checking for fever with his eyes alone, and Jihoon backs away instinctively.

“Yes, I’m fine.” he says shortly, gaze dropping to the cash register. “Have a good day.”

Soonyoung, because he doesn’t know when to back down, chases his forehead, eyes searching. “You sure?”

Jihoon grabs Soonyoung’s shoulders and pushes him as gently as possible for him to get the hint without being too aggressive. “I said it’s fine. Don’t bother yourself.”

“You’re my friend, Jihoonie, it doesn’t bother me.”

“I- I’m fine. Thanks for worrying about me, though.” Jihoon turns away before he loses himself to the sincerity in Soonyoung’s eyes, fleeing to the safety of the back room, where sprigs of snipped stems and discarded leaves litter the floor spider-webbed with cracks. He pretends not to watch Soonyoung and Wonwoo leave reluctantly, Wonwoo’s hand rubbing Soonyoung’s back soothingly. Hunching over, Jihoon sweeps the sprouts into his other hand, tossing the small accumulated pile into the garbage can.

When he sits down again on his stool, the quaint shop overpopulated with blooms feels lonely.

 

Soonyoung drops by again next week, but their exchanges are stilted and awkward, and Soonyoung doesn’t seem like he knows what to do with this change.

He tries his best to clear the stuffy air with jokes and anecdotes, but Jihoon replies curtly or not at all, and though he could definitely carry on a conversation with just himself and Jihoon’s minimal responses, the blatant hurt shown in the set of his shoulders and frown on his lips makes him quiet down.

Jihoon hands over his bouquet for this week – anemones and cyclamen – and steels his slightly trembling hand. He appreciates Soonyoung’s efforts, really, he does. But there are some things that Jihoon can’t bring himself to work past, despite his own efforts, and one of those is his own broken heart. Maybe not broken; he’s still not really sure how a simple crush can lead to this kind of pain, but then again, it’s  _ Soonyoung _ , and one never really knows how things happen when it comes to Soonyoung.

As Soonyoung departs, a pair of men brush past him into the tense atmosphere.

“My little-wittle Ji!” Jeonghan cries, rushing forward to pinch Jihoon’s cheeks. Jihoon swipes at Jeonghan’s hands half-heartedly, sighing loudly and rolling his eyes to Joshua, who laughs.

“Hi Jihoon, how’s the shop?” Joshua asks, ruffling his hair affectionately.

Jihoon smiles a little. Despite his pained chest, his two favorite people never fail to bring some light into his day, especially when their own happiness is so infectious. “It’s doing well,” he says modestly.

Joshua nods earnestly and looks closely at him, hand finding Jeonghan’s. “And how are you?” he adds.

“I’m…” Jihoon trails off. He’s really an open book to Jeonghan and Joshua; there’s basically no point in trying to hide it. Jeonghan’s already leaning over the counter and brushing his bangs to the side to peer into his eyes like a doctor.

“What’s wrong, Ji?” Jeonghan questions, voice low.

“Er… You see, I met someone....” Jihoon begins hesitantly.

As expected, the couple shrieks and clutches Jihoon’s hands. “Really? Who?”

“Wait a minute,” Jeonghan says suddenly. “You look so sad… What did he do? Did he hurt your feelings? Who am I beating up? C’mon, Ji, give me names!”

Joshua traces gentle circles on Jeonghan’s palm and hushes him. “We’re not going to be violent, Hannie,” he interrupts. “But, Jihoon, what  _ did  _ he do?”

Jihoon smiles sadly at his brother. “Well… He’s, um, he’s really nice, and pretty, and he didn’t really do anything to me…”

“But?”

“But just as I accepted my feelings for him, he kind of walked in here with his boyfriend?” His voice breaks a little at the last word, and he buries his head in his arms on the counter.

Jeonghan makes an angry noise in the back of his throat. “He led you on? What kind of dipshit… Shua, let me go, there is an asshole I have to fight! He hurt our Hoonie!”

In contrast to Jeonghan’s livid demeanor, Joshua looks kind of… sad. Sad for Jihoon, sad for the circumstances. “I’m so sorry, Jihoon,” he murmurs, squeezing his hand. “Sometimes, things just can’t work out, you know?”

“Yeah,” Jihoon sighs. He’s been doing that an awful lot lately.

He fiddles with the stem of a withered flower, watching the crinkled petals drift to the floor in silence. Joshua’s voice startles him out of his reverie.

“So,” he starts timidly. “Are you going to try to get over him, or tell him your feelings, or…?”

“No!” Jihoon blurts out. “I mean, no, I’m not going to tell him. Why make it even more awkward than it is now? You know, I’ve been an absolute dick to him all month, he’s starting to give up on speaking with me…”

“Jihoon! Really?” Joshua says, his eyes gentle but somehow disapproving. “If you’re not going to tell him, maybe you should accept things and move on. You’ll just end up hurting the both of you.”

_ I’m already hurting _ , Jihoon thinks sullenly.  _ He hurt me first _ .

He lets out a huff and runs a hand through his short black hair. “I… I guess you’re right. Even though it’s going to be a miserable attempt.”

“At least try,” Joshua suggests, voice soft and encouraging. “I know you can do it! You’re a really strong person, Jihoon.” Then he yelps, Jeonghan having finally wrestled his way out of Joshua’s grip.

“Give me names!” he demands, shaking Jihoon’s shoulders. “You can do all the sad things, I’ll make him pay!”

Jihoon laughs a little at his older brother. “Hyung, you’re really too much, it’s not that bad.”

He stills. “Are you really going to try to get over him, Ji? You seem really broken-hearted. I just want the best for you, you know.”

The younger nods and manages a genuine smile. “I know. Thank you… I love you both, okay?”

Joshua wipes away an invisible tear and dashes behind the counter to hug him. Jeonghan follows suit immediately, enveloping Jihoon in the care of his best supporters.

“We love you too!” they chorus.

 

\- x -

 

Soonyoung slinks into the shop keeping his gaze fixed on the dull floor tiles, hands stuffed into his pockets. His head snaps up in surprise when he’s greeted with a shy, “Good morning, Soonyoung,” from the short man perched on the stool behind the counter.

“I, uh… Good morning, Jihoon.” His voice is fragile and confused, and Jihoon’s chest tightens.

“I have your bouquet ready. How was your week?” He asks, bending down to fetch the flowers. Today it’s purple hyacinth and sprigs of white ivy, tied loosely with a charming purple ribbon.

Soonyoung looks taken aback but answers nonetheless, “It was okay. Not wonderful.” He takes the bouquet with slightly trembling hands and looks back down.

Jihoon bites his lips momentarily before blurting out a panicked, “I’m really sorry! I didn’t mean to be a dick all month – okay, maybe I did – but I’m really really sorry I was!” He grabs Soonyoung’s hands and forces him to meet his eyes, which are burning a little. “Please forgive me!” He finishes, bowing and almost hitting his head on the counter.

Soonyoung flinches, and his lips part in a surprised ‘O.’ When Jihoon doesn’t stand back up, he nudges gently at his head, urging him up. “Yah, stand up, Jihoonie.” he says softly.

“Not until you accept my apology,” Jihoon mumbles stubbornly, hiding the surge of relief at the return of Soonyoung’s fond nickname.

“Of course I accept it,” Soonyoung rolls his eyes. “I wasn’t mad or anything, just confused.”

Jihoon nods and rises, fingers fidgeting. “Sorry.”

“Don’t worry about it! I hope you’re better now?”

Jihoon bites the inside of his cheek and slowly nods again, trying to summon words to explain  _ why _ he had suddenly decided to ice out Soonyoung without sounding bitter and jealous. “Yeah, I was just… going through some things.”

“Oh,” he says, looking sad. Jihoon feels a pang in his chest at his sympathetic eyes; it’s really not fair for Soonyoung to be so adorable and sincere when Jihoon’s trying to get over him. “You can always talk to me, Jihoonie. I’ll always be here for you!”

“...Thanks.”

“Well, I have to go now, but thank you for the flowers as always, Jihoonie! And for, well, everything!” He slides a few bills on the counter and dashes out of the shop with a brilliant smile directed to Jihoon’s weak, weak heart.

When the shop is finally empty and the orange rays of the setting sun stream through the windows, Jihoon sinks onto the floor and lightly hits his head on the floor cabinets repeatedly, muttering, “Kwon Soonyoung, fuck you. God, I wish.”

 

And just like that, they’re back to being friends. Awkward friends, yes, with Soonyoung occasionally hesitant to brush Jihoon’s bangs to the side, and Jihoon occasionally staring too long at Soonyoung’s lips and having to snap out of his stupor before he’s officially brandished as  _ creepy _ , but friends nonetheless.

It’s a brisk, sunny afternoon when Soonyoung bursts in and bounds up to the counter, exuberant smile in place as usual.

“Jihoonie!” he calls out, eyes crinkled. 

Jihoon looks up from his phone. “Hi, Soonyoung.”

Soonyoung looks like he’s bracing himself and suddenly blurts out, “It’s such a nice day and will you come with me to get some coffee?” He pauses for breath and tacks on, “Please?”

Soonyoung looks so  _ golden _ from where Jihoon is standing: the golden rays illuminate the stray hairs flying about and his toothy grin is even more effervescent. His eyes are actually sparkling, and the faint blush on his cheeks from probably running all the way to Jihoon’s shop makes his face all soft and rosy, and Jihoon thinks,  _ ah, so this is what it’s like to be in love. _

Wait.  _ In love? _

Yes, Jihoon was deep in the pit of in  _ like,  _ but love was a whole other monster he didn’t really want to deal with. And yet, despite his (meager) efforts to abandon the thrill in his chest when Soonyoung appears every Sunday, his tiny bud of attachment to Soonyoung had somehow blossomed into full-on  _ love _ . It festers in his ribcage like the overgrown, gnarled magnolia tree by the shop; it’s all twisted and entangled with his own bones, but the petals smell so sweet, and the vibrant tendrils of pink are irresistable. In other words, Jihoon is so absolutely, irrevocably in love.

He wants to say yes. God, he wants to say yes  _ so much _ .

So it’s not really a surprise when his mouth moves of its own accord, managing a shy “Sure, I’ll go with you,” without Jihoon’s brain registering it.  _ Fuck!  _ He thinks, panicked.  _ Now I’m going to fall even more in love with him and there’s no way I’m crawling out of this pit!  _

A small, traitorous part of him whispers,  _ But why can’t you have this one blissful thing for yourself? It’s not like he’s cheating or anything; it’s just coffee _ .

And so that’s how Jihoon finds himself sitting across from Soonyoung in a lovely cafe, air spiced with cinnamon and what might be hopes doomed from the start. Soonyoung is radiant here too, and the fumes of freshly brewed coffee wreathe around his head, framing the soft, soft face with nothing but pure happiness illuminating it.

“Thanks for coming, Jihoonie,” Soonyoung says bashfully over his mug of Americano. “I really appreciate it.”

“No problem,” Jihoon shrugs. He appears nonchalant when really his insides are squirming and aching to lean over and kiss Soonyoung senseless. It’s kind of a problem.

They slip into a comfortable silence, both sipping idly at their coffee and watching each other unsubtly. Jihoon thinks he could live like this forever, in this resplendent bubble, with nothing but him and Soonyoung and the heat of brushed hands and overly sweetened coffee.

“So… any hobbies outside of the whole flower thing?” Soonyoung finally asks.

Jihoon considers his question and taps on his mug with his trimmed fingernails. “Not really,” he answers. “I like music and I go to classes, but that’s about it. I wouldn’t really count it as a hobby or anything.” 

“So you’re really into flowers?”

“Yeah, I guess you could say that.” he allows, smiling. “I do spend the majority of my time in the shop.”

“Wow,” Soonyoung says, mouth falling open. “Is it nice? To be surrounded by flowers all the time?”

Jihoon takes a sip of his coffee to stall. “Kind of. It sucks if you have a headache, ‘cause their scents can be really overpowering, but most of the time it’s a little like… a friend who’s always there.”

Soonyoung adds, “...that people buy…”

He frowns. “That’s a little sad. My only friends are those flowers and they have to be replaced every day.”

Soonyoung leans forward and slams his hands on the table, making Jihoon’s heart skip a beat. “And me! I’m your friend!”

“A-and you,” Jihoon repeats.

He sits back down, a smug smile playing on his lips. “That’s right,” he says, satisfied. “I, Kwon Soonyoung, am Lee Jihoon’s friend.”

_ You’re a lot more than my friend,  _ Jihoon wants to say.  _ Or I wish you were. _

Instead, the corners of his lips lift ever so slightly. “I mean, I guess so,” he says, half-playfully. “You should be grateful for that label, you know. I don’t let random people run around letting the world know I’m their friend.”

Soonyoung nods eagerly. “I’m really grateful, Jihoonie, you don’t even know,” he gushes. Then he stands up, chair screeching, and says, “I’m gonna tell the world I’m your friend, that’s how grateful I am.”

And before Jihoon knows it, Soonyoung stepped onto his chair and is shouting, the patrons of the cafe looking up in alarm or amusement or both.

“I am Lee Jihoon’s friend and it’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me!” he glances at Jihoon and his eyes scrunch up with he sees Jihoon’s flush. “He’s the most wonderful person in the world and I’m so glad to be his friend!”

“Soonyoung!” Jihoon hisses, tugging on his sleeve. “What are you doing?”

“I’m letting the world know I’m your friend,” he says innocently.

Okay, even though this is embarrassing and  _ they’re in public, for God’s sake,  _ Jihoon is secretly squashing the butterflies that swarm his gut. They’re flitting in the monstrous flowers entwined with his ribs, giddy with delight. Soonyoung… He’s so loud, and unashamed, and though Jihoon would normally be mortified, he can’t help but feel endeared by this lovely, lovely boy who is unafraid to broadcast to the world their friendship.

_ He’s the most wonderful person in the world. _

It echoes in his mind long after Soonyoung drops him off at the shop, long after the sun has settled below the horizon, long after the moon has clambered up into the velvet night. Jihoon crawls into bed with a sleepy, lovesick smile on his lips and soft, coffee-tainted thoughts brewing.

As his eyes flutter shut, he murmurs, “Kwon Soonyoung…  _ You  _ are the most wonderful person in the world, and I love you.”

(He wakes up the next morning feeling guilty and shameful and just a little bit satisfied. It’s enough to make him groan into his pillow and rub his face a little more vigorously than usual when he washes up.)

 

Jihoon dwells in the oh-so-blissful ignorance for maybe a month or two.

He’s still hopelessly in love and has pretty much given up on getting over Soonyoung for the time being; instead, he devotes his time to making pretty bouquets for Soonyoung to take to his mother and to making endless playlists of love songs – anything French or from the 70’s will do – and before he knows it Joshua is back in front of him, asking about his love life.

“I’m doing okay,” he says awkwardly, determinedly  _ not looking  _ at the bouquet of gardenia stashed under the counter.

“And how are you doing with Soonyoung?”

Soonyoung is as affectionate as ever. He’s giggly and kind of easy to be infatuated with; his broad smiles and puckered lips and pink, shining cheeks are rather nice to look at, and Jihoon can feel himself slipping into deeper love every day.

“I’m over him,” Jihoon lies.

Joshua raises a skeptical eyebrow. “Yeah? Good on you.”

“Yeah,” Jihoon echoes. “There’s nothing between us.”  _ Shit,  _ he thinks worriedly.  _ Did that sound too bitter?  _

Joshua makes a disbelieving sound and presses his lips together. “...You sure you’re over him? It doesn’t really sound like you are.”

“Am I that bad of a liar?” he asks, huffing out a laugh.

“Kind of.”

He busies himself with brushing stray leaves off the counter and pointedly doesn’t meet Joshua’s questioning gaze. He turns around fully and sighs with Joshua’s next inquiry.

“So… You’re in love with him?”

Jihoon finally glances at the hidden gardenia. “Yeah,” he murmurs. “I am.”

“Oh, Ji,” Joshua’s lips turn down a little in sympathy. He pushes through to behind the counter and wraps his arms around Jihoon gently, running his hands up and down his back soothingly. “It’s okay.”

Jihoon sniffles a little and turns his head to rest against Joshua’s shoulder. “I-I’m sorry,” he says between gasps for breath. “I know I should have gotten over him… I really tried, I swear.”

“Shh,” the older boy combs through his hair with his fingers. “I know you tried, Ji, you did your best… I shouldn’t have told you that, you can’t control your feelings, after all.”

“Is it bad that I don’t want anything to change? W-We went out for coffee once, and I guess he’s like this with all his friends, but he makes me feel… I don’t know, special? Like maybe we could have something more… in different circumstances.”

“Give it some time,” Joshua suggests softly, as if not to shatter Jihoon’s fragile state. “Nothing has to happen now, just… let things happen, as friends. Don’t do anything you might regret, okay?”

He nods and surrenders to Joshua’s arms, limply crying into his shirt.

They stay like that for a long time, even when Jihoon’s tears have long run dry and he feels wobbly and off-axis. There are other forms of love, Jihoon realizes. He loves Joshua like he loves Jeonghan: a kind of brotherly bond that he can rely on, one that he can trust will never let him down. And he’s so, so grateful for them, the two of his best friends.

“Thank you, Joshua,” he says hoarsely. Then he carefully extricates him from Joshua’s hold, swiping at his eyes weakly. “Well. Better get back to work.”

Joshua nods and steps back, settling on a crate in the corner as Jihoon tries to erase the traces of his crying.

When Soonyoung steps in, as expected, he smiles at Jihoon before cocking his head sideways. “Are you okay, Jihoonie? You look like you’ve been crying.”

“Thanks, Soonyoung, I know I look like shit,” Jihoon says, dodging Soonyoung’s attempts to peer closely at his eyes.

“That’s not what I meant!” he yelps, giving up and just standing in front of him. “I won’t ask if you don’t want to tell me, but just know that you can always talk to me, Jihoonie. I’ll always listen.”

He lowers his eyes and smiles a little sadly. “Thanks, Soonyoung,” he says again, this time sincerely. “I appreciate it. But I’d rather not talk about it.”

“Okay, I understand.”

Jihoon takes out the bouquet of gardenia and offers it to Soonyoung shyly. “Here you go. I hope you like them.”

Soonyoung beams at him and takes the bundle of flowers, taking in a deep breath to smell the fragrant, intoxicating perfume of gardenia. “Thank you, Jihoonie,” he says happily. “I love them, as always!”

He departs with a cute little wave and Joshua coughs from his spot in the corner. “I hope he doesn’t have a book on flower meanings,” he mutters.

Jihoon flushes promptly. “Shut up.”

 

\- x -

 

On another Sunday, Soonyoung bursts in heaving for breath.

“Hi, Jihoonie,” he gets out, stumbling up to the counter. “Sorry I’m a sweaty mess.”

He is indeed a sweaty mess at the moment, but Jihoon is infatuated enough to find the beads of sweat at his forehead and his gasping mouth hot. “It’s alright,” he says easily. “What’s wrong?”

“Wonwoo is a forgetful ass so I’ve got to get him an anniversary bouquet,” Soonyoung pants, hands on his knees. “He’s trying to cook right now so I ran all the way here.”

Oh.

Jihoon had somewhat deluded himself into pretending Wonwoo just didn’t exist. That maybe this was another universe where Soonyoung  _ hadn’t  _ come in his shop with his boyfriend and flirted with him as Jihoon presented to Soonyoung a bouquet professing his love for him. In that universe, Jihoon wouldn’t cry himself to sleep every night or thumb through WikiHow articles titled “How To Get Over A Crush,” none of which have helped in the slightest.

Instead, Jihoon is stuck in this universe, where Soonyoung and Wonwoo probably live together and share a bed and cuddle at night while Jihoon is burying his face in his pillow. Where no matter how much Soonyoung coos at him or offers coffee, nothing will ever come of it. Where Jihoon is just utterly enamored with Soonyoung just to set himself up for a heartbreak every other week.

“The, uh, the anniversary bouquets are over there.” Jihoon points to the section of plentiful sunflowers and roses and watches forlornly as Soonyoung dashes over to pick one. He stifles a wet chuckle as Soonyoung, apparently unsure of which one to pick, closes his eyes and points at a random one.

God, why did he have to fall in love with a dork? A  _ taken  _ dork, for that matter.

“Thank you so much, Jihoonie!”

With a few bills scattered on the counter, Soonyoung proceeds to sprint out of the shop and presumably back to his (and Wonwoo’s, Jihoon reminds himself) apartment.

The shop empty save for his own thoughts, Jihoon sinks to the floor and covers his mouth, choking out quiet sobs. With a few words from Soonyoung, his entire world had crumbled – all the honey-tinted walls had collapsed, and with it Jihoon’s hopes.

 

It’s a little awkward the next few times Soonyoung stops in.

Jihoon is stiff and shy again, wincing at the now-familiar sting of  _ Soonyoung has a boyfriend and it’s not me.  _ When Soonyoung asks friendly questions, Jihoon replies with a few words and a half-hearted smile, and he can tell by the look in Soonyoung’s eyes that he wants to ask but doesn’t want to intrude.

It’s not like they’re that close, anyway.

“Sorry I’m being like this,” Jihoon apologizes one day. “I haven’t been feeling like myself for awhile.”

Soonyoung immediately shakes his head. “It’s okay! Do you want to talk about it?”

“Not really,” he says, looking away. “It’s kind of personal.”

“Oh,” Soonyoung says softly. “Sorry for bothering you about it, then. I hope everything’s okay or getting better?”

“It’s all fine,” Jihoon shrugs. “Mostly just my own problems, you know?”

He looks at Jihoon tenderly, softly, and if Jihoon didn’t know that he was dating Wonwoo, he might have mistaken that look for something else.

“Yeah, I know,” Soonyoung says, taking Jihoon’s hand in his own and rubbing slow, slow circles. “I’m sorry. I’d really like to help, but… I don’t want to be a nuisance or anything. So just know that I’ll always be here for you, okay?”

“O-Okay…” Jihoon’s forced to look at Soonyoung now, their eyes meeting and freezing the other. “Thanks… You’re a really good friend to me, Soonyoung.”

“Right back at ya!”

Jihoon is definitely not a really good friend to Soonyoung. He’s closed off and draws back every other month and all they really know about each other is that Soonyoung is Jihoon’s only friend other than his brother and his brother’s boyfriend and that Jihoon spends all his time with flowers that never answer his despaired questions.

And yet, despite nothing next to nothing about Soonyoung, Jihoon is  _ drawn  _ to him. He loves the other’s bright smile and persistence and energy. He loves Soonyoung’s hands and how he moves fluidly like he’s comfortable in his own body and how he can make the room a thousand times brighter by grinning at Jihoon. He loves even the pastel blue bicycle he rides here, and the way he rambles when he’s talking about food or dance, and how he’s completely unafraid to broadcast to the world what he’s feeling.

He just loves Soonyoung. Cute cheeks and loud personality and all.

“Are you busy right now? I never paid you back for the coffee last time.” He’s nervous.  _ This isn’t a date, _ he tells himself, just a completely platonic suggestion for food and hot drinks and company.

“You don’t have to pay me back,” Soonyoung says immediately. “But sure, let’s go! I’m in the mood for a gingerbread latte.”

“You drink the seasonal drinks?” he asks, wrinkling his nose.

Soonyoung looks offended. “Of course I do,” he says indignantly. “The gingerbread latte is to  _ die  _ for, have you tried it?”

“It tastes like bland cinnamon blended with a cup of cream and sugar.”

“So what you’re saying is that they’re perfect, ‘cause I don’t hear anything unpleasant about that.”

They bicker about coffee all the way to the cafe, and even as Jihoon trudges through mounds of slush and grimaces at the cold wind on his face, he feels warm inside.

 

They’re seated by the window again, but on a different side this time.

Soonyoung is leaning over the table and smiling at Jihoon over his mug, eyes fond and lit up as he talks about the holidays.

“...Christmas isn’t a holiday, it’s a lifestyle!”

Jihoon nods, amused, and gestures for him to go on.

“I mean, doesn’t the start of December just… I dunno, make you feel all giddy and excited? Like if you were sleeping all year and you could only wake up for one month, it would be December, right?”

“Mhm,” Jihoon says, thinking,  _ December doesn’t make me feel that way; you do. _

“God, I just love the holidays so much,” he says, wiping away an invisible tear. “The lights are so pretty and you can see heat in the air and the snow is so ethereal and delicate… and the food is always good around this time of year… and Christmas music is so optimistic and cheerful and everyone knows the songs so you can just sing them randomly and someone will join in....”

Jihoon takes a sip of his black coffee. “Yep,” he says intelligently.

“Anyway, I’m sorry for rambling, I just feel really strongly about Christmas and December.” Soonyoung looks a little embarrassed, but he’s still alight and flushed from excitement.

“It’s okay, I like hearing you talk.”

He did  _ not  _ say that. Jihoon wants to slap himself.

“Oh,” Soonyoung giggles shyly. “Thanks, Jihoonie.”

“No problem,” he mutters.

“By the way, I’ve been meaning to ask,” Soonyoung begins apprehensively. He’s uneasy; it shows in the taps of his fingers and the set of his jaw. He really is an open book. “What are  _ your  _ favorite flowers?”

“Me?”

“Yeah, you. Who else?”

Jihoon considers this. He has no idea why Soonyoung would want to know other than out of pure curiosity, but he still wants to make a good impression. It would be pretty awful if Soonyoung secretly hated his favorite flowers.

“I’ve always been fond of peonies,” Jihoon confides. “And irises.”

“Ooh,” Soonyoung says playfully. “We have a man of taste here.”

Jihoon swats away Soonyoung’s wiggling fingers and pretends to be unaffected. “Shut up,” he whines.

“I like peonies too,” Soonyoung adds, finally succeeding in poking his cheek. “And irises.”

“You better.”

 

\- x -

 

Jihoon’s picking off stray leaves from the front of his tattered apron when the door opens.

It’s been a good day. No one really buys flowers in winter, except for poinsettias, but everyone gets those from the vendors on the streets. He made Seungkwan take over his morning shift and instead went for brunch with Jeonghan and Joshua. He’s grateful for the both of them; even though he kind of felt like he was third-wheeling, or at least intruding on something (like a date), they made him feel welcome and all warm inside.

It’s the golden hour; the sunlight is practically decadent in the way it soaks the tile in its glow, spilling off the curled leaves. And everything is perfect: he’s wearing his good pair of jeans today, and the playlist that’s on shuffle play has been playing all the good songs, and yeah, everything’s perfect.

So when he sees Soonyoung’s face, all lit up and red at the nose, why does he feel a sense of dread?

He’s holding something behind his back as he scoots up to Jihoon, smiling shyly. Something feels different today, and it’s off-putting. Different means change. He can smell change in the air like some people can smell the oncoming rain, and just like some people avoid the rain, Jihoon avoids change.

“Hey, Jihoonie,” Soonyoung says, ears pink. From the cold, probably. “Before you say anything, I kind of have something I wanted to say to you.”

Damn. So something really is different today. Jihoon braces himself.

“Go ahead,” he says.

Soonyoung takes in a deep breath and shakes his head, as if he’s trying to relax. His expression is hard to read, but it’s a little unsure. Different.

“So, like,” he begins, shoulders pushed back and eyes earnest. “I know we don’t really know each other all that well, but I feel like we’ve known each other for years. I mean, I know random little things about you, like your coffee order and how your eyes widen when you’re surprised and how you always scold your employees for slacking off but you care about them too much to force them to work when they’ve had a really bad day, and… And I like all these little things about you. Like seeing you and your little habits and jokes make me really happy, happier than I’ve been in the past few months, and it’s all because of you.

“I’m rambling a lot but I guess what I’m trying to say is that… I really like  _ you _ , and I think you’re the most kind, cute, witty, talented human being alive, and I would really like it if you could accept my feelings?”

Soonyoung finally reveals what he’s hiding and Jihoon’s mouth parts a little. In his hands are the stems of eleven full, blush-pink peonies. 

The first thing, surprisingly, that runs through Jihoon’s mind is,  _ Wait a minute, where could he have gotten peonies from? They don’t bloom in winter, and we don’t sell them around now… _

Soonyoung follows Jihoon’s gaze and laughs nervously. “Oh, I got these from my mom,” he explains. “We have a kind of greenhouse? It’s pretty small, but it’s just for peonies anyway. I thought you should have them?” The last part comes out as a question, and Soonyoung bites his lip as he waits for Jihoon to respond.

This feels like some sort of cruel dream, Jihoon decides. There he is, the love of his life in front of him, brandishing his favorite flowers and his favorite smile in the world, and he just  _ can’t  _ say yes. Because there’s got to be something wrong here. What about Wonwoo?

Which is exactly what he says, to Soonyoung’s crestfallen expression.

“What about Wonwoo?” he asks, dumbly.

“Oh,” Soonyoung says, lips turning down. “You like Wonwoo?”

“No, um, I think you’ve got the wrong person,” Jihoon tries to explain, not meeting Soonyoung’s eyes. “Like what you’re saying shouldn’t be for me? Unless you’re into polyamory, I mean… which is totally fine, of course, um…”

Soonyoung tilts his head in confusion. “Are you trying to turn me down in a nice way? Because I get it, yeah, it’s really out of the blue and I didn’t even ask if you were single and it’s not like you would like me in that way anyway… I’m really sorry!” And with that he drops the bouquet on the counter and dashes out of the shop, forgoing his bicycle as he flees to the safety of his apartment.

_ Holy shit,  _ Jihoon thinks, still not quite understanding what just happened.  _ What was that?  _

He isn’t sure what was with the hurt written all over Soonyoung’s face and what seemed like disappointment, and he still isn’t sure what Soonyoung said or did. He’s just… kind of standing there, dumbfounded, with the bunch of lovely peonies at his fingertips.

The light pink streaks in the sky mock him as he stares out the window for the rest of the evening. A good day indeed.

\- x -

 

“Ji, are you okay? You’re not really acting like yourself today.”

Jihoon snaps out of his trance and looks up at Jeonghan, who’s leaning over him in concern. “Uh, yeah, I’m fine.”

“You’re not,” Jeonghan informs him matter-of-factly. “What’s going on?”

“I’m not sure,” Jihoon says honestly. “I really have no idea what’s going on.”

His brother squints at him. “What do you mean?”

“Yesterday Soonyoung came in and said some really confusing things and brought me peonies and I’m really confused.” Jihoon blurts out, recounting the incident the day before.

Jeonghan stops trying to peer into his eyes and blanches. “He what?” he gapes.

“He came into the shop and told me how I was talented and caring and offered me those.” Jihoon points to the peonies in a vase by his bed, sighing wistfully as he admires the folds of pink and white.

“Y’know, that sounds a lot like a confession,” Jeonghan points out. “Did he break up with his boyfriend or something?”

“I’m not sure,” Jihoon says. “Like I said, I have no idea what’s happening. And when I asked, he kind of started rambling and ran out.”

Jeonghan plops down on the bed beside Jihoon and rubs his shoulders comfortingly. “I’m not really sure what’s going on, either,” he admits. “Why don’t you try to find him and ask?”

“I don’t know where to start,” Jihoon groans, collapsing onto his pillow. “And I don’t know if I can face him after that. It felt really tense for some reason.”

“Maybe there’s been a misunderstanding,” Jeonghan suggests. “Ask Seokmin for his address or something.”

“Maybe,” Jihoon agrees. He’s a little terrified of facing Soonyoung after that – whatever that had been, he’d barely heard Soonyoung’s words, he was speaking so fast – and he doesn’t want to admit that to Jeonghan.

Jeonghan stands up and smiles sympathetically. “Well, whenever you get the courage to talk to him, I hope it goes well.” As he steps out of the room, he adds, “Don’t take too long, okay?”

“Okay,” Jihoon sighs, turning over and clutching at the blanket. “Thanks for everything.”

“Anything for my sweet little brother,” Jeonghan calls out cheerfully.

  
  


Jihoon’s sitting idly at his spot in the shop the next morning when someone walks in.

“Good morning, how can I help you?” he asks automatically, sliding in a bookmark before he looks up.

Jihoon freezes.

“Good morning? You could call it that, I suppose.” Wonwoo says casually, hands tucked in pockets as he approaches Jihoon.

He stays silent, fingers curling around the corners of the book. Wonwoo isn’t really doing anything, but his cold gaze and long black coat make Jihoon feel intimidated. Like he’s done something wrong. Except he hasn’t. Right?

“Hmm, how do I say this…” The man presses his lips together and stares at Jihoon disapprovingly. “Soonyoung’s been crying about you all last night and I’m pretty sure he’s still crying right now in his sleep.”

“W-What?”

Of all the things Jihoon was expecting Wonwoo to say – or hoping, really – this was the last one he had anticipated. He had kind of hoped he would ask for a bouquet of tulips and leave Jihoon alone to distract himself.

“Yeah,” Wonwoo says, tone light as if the subject is too. “So what went down? I thought you liked him.”

“I’m sorry!” Jihoon blurts out, eyes guilty. “I shouldn’t have fallen for him, I know, I’m really sorry for causing trouble. You don’t have to forgive me but I’m really really sorry!”

He raises an eyebrow, curious now. “Why would you falling for Soonyoung be an issue? Isn’t that what you both wanted?”

“I mean, I really tried to not feel anything, but feelings are fickle, and I don’t know, he was just there? I didn’t mean to make your relationship awkward, or to make Soonyoung feel awkward…”

Wonwoo’s mouth falls open, and his eyes flash with understanding. “Ah, I see… Jihoon, Soonyoung and I aren’t dating.”

“What?” This is the worst news possible. Jihoon’s ruined a relationship, all because he couldn’t keep his heart eyes to himself! “You broke up?!”

“No, oh my God,” Wonwoo groans, rubbing at his eyes. “We were never dating. Whatever you think is between Soonyoung and me doesn’t exist. We’re just friends.”

“Is this a joke?” Jihoon asks, eyebrows furrowed. “But I heard you guys, saying that you loved each other… Sorry, is this supposed to be funny?”

Wonwoo laughs a little. “I do love Soonyoung,” he says firmly. “But only platonically. We’ve been best friends since, like, preschool. Did you really think we were dating?”

“Yes,” he replies weakly, sinking onto the stool. “You two… really aren’t? I don’t believe this…”

“Believe me, I would never date him. And I’m dating someone else, by the way. Soonyoung bought an anniversary bouquet for me, he didn’t tell you?”

“He did,” Jihoon says quietly, looking down at his trembling hands. “He also said it was for you. But he didn’t clarify that it was for your relationship with someone else… So all this time, I’ve been convinced that I was in love with someone already dating someone else, when he was there, single, the whole time?”

“Sounds about right,” Wonwoo agrees. “Wait, you’re in love with him?”

“Yes,” Jihoon nods slowly. “Have been. For awhile now.”

“Holy shit, you guys are terrible. He thinks you don’t like him, you know.”

Jihoon’s eyes widen and he leans forward, biting the inside of his cheek. “Where is he? Can I see him now?”

“Hell yeah, he’s a wreck,” Wonwoo huffs. “Just come with me, I’ll give you a ride.”

Jihoon fumbles at his phone to beg Seungkwan to cover for him as he slides into Wonwoo’s beat-up Honda, running a distressed hand through his hair. God, he’s been so  _ dumb  _ all this time. Why had he jumped to conclusions right then and there? Why had he been so completely delusional?

Wait. What if Soonyoung doesn’t like him anymore? What if he’d finally seen how dense and thick-headed Jihoon was and decided to give it up in favor of someone smarter and better at picking up on social cues?  _ What a shitty love story,  _ Jihoon thinks sourly. Soonyoung wouldn’t give up that quickly, would he?

“Stop bouncing your leg, the car is going to explode,” Wonwoo orders, eyes darting over to see Jihoon’s state of apprehension. “You have nothing to worry about. Soonyoung’s gonna cry a lot, but at least they’ll be happy tears, right?”

Jihoon makes a sound of assent and presses down on his thigh to stop bouncing, except he’s kind of shaking, and it’s really hard to stop. He’s never been this nervous before. Not even before his CSAT, and he had almost burst into tears when he’d slipped into his seat. Then again, Soonyoung’s made him feel all kinds of newfangled  _ feelings  _ Jihoon had never experienced before.

Wonwoo pulls to a stop and shoos Jihoon out of his car. “Now go get him, Jihoon. Don’t fuck it up.”

“Thanks,” Jihoon mutters, climbing out and sending one final wavery smile to him. “I won’t fuck it up again.”

 

He ascends the stairs two at a time, breathing heavily, and when he’s finally hunched over in front of Apartment 7B, he has to tell himself to calm down before raising a trembling fist to knock.

_ Don’t fuck it up,  _ he hears Wonwoo say, and Jihoon nods to himself. He won’t fuck it up this time. He’s going to  _ calmly  _ tell Soonyoung his feelings and apologize and maybe, just maybe, if that goes well, he can ask Soonyoung to be his boyfriend. Maybe.

He hits the door lightly, hesitant, but when he waits for a few more seconds without any response, he wonders if he hit the door at all. He’s positioning his hand in front of the dark brown wood again when it swings open, almost hitting Jihoon in the face. 

“Sorry,” he hears someone sniff, and Soonyoung pokes his head out to check who he almost smacked. “Sorry, no one’s home, come back later!” He yelps, attempting to shut the door when he catches sight of the younger boy, looking up at him with blazing eyes.

Jihoon grabs the door and gulps. “Wait, Soonyoung, I really wanna talk to you right now. It’s really important,” he pleads.

“What is it? Are you okay?” he asks suddenly, peering at Jihoon in concern.

Taken aback, Jihoon blinks at the proximity and swallows hard. “I’m okay, but, uh…I just wanted to apologize.”

“Oh.” Soonyoung says flatly, looking down. “You don’t have to be sorry for not returning my feelings. It’s not your fault.”

“No, wait, that’s not what I’m sorry for,” says Jihoon. “I’m sorry for completely misunderstanding you and making assumptions. I’m sorry for seemingly disregarding your feelings.”

Soonyoung tilts his head in confusion. It makes him look even cuter than he did before, nose pink and mouth in a permanent pout.

“Most of all,” he continues. “I’m sorry for letting you run out of the shop without telling you the truth. I’m sorry for letting it come to this point where we didn’t know what the other was feeling. I’m sorry for making you think I don’t like you back when I’m actually head over heels in love with you. I’m sorry for hurting you, I’m sorry for making you wait, I’m sorry for everything. Please forgive me, Soonyoung.”

He bows at a right angle, and it’s reminiscent of when he’d bowed the very same way to the very same boy in apology, begging for forgiveness. It’s not the very same reaction, though, from Soonyoung.

“I- what?”

“I’m sorry for-” Jihoon begins, ready to bare his heart all over again.

Soonyoung laughs wetly. “No, I heard you fine, but Jihoon– what? Wait…” 

“I love you,” he blurts out, looking up to meet Soonyoung’s watery eyes. “I’m in love with you, and I have been for basically forever, and I never want to let you go, but if that’s what you want I’ll be okay with it.”

“You love me?”

Soonyoung’s voice is all fluttery and disbelieving and soft, and Jihoon can almost melt from the sight of Soonyoung’s warm, warm eyes, shining with the light of all the stars.

“Yeah,” he replies hoarsely. “I do.”

“What the fuck,” Soonyoung whispers, reaching for Jihoon’s hands and cupping them in his own. “Okay, wow. I wasn’t expecting that. Do you want to come in?”

Jihoon nods, and he lets himself be tugged into Soonyoung’s apartment toeing off his shoes hurriedly and never letting his eyes wander from Soonyoung, this wonderful, wonderful boy who holds the sun and her flowers and the night sky in his smile.

They’re sat across from each other at his kitchen table, both breathing in the steam from freshly brewed jasmine tea. Jihoon stares and stares at Soonyoung, making the other boy fidget and finally say, “So… you love me?” He’s bright and mischievous, but Jihoon can tell that he’s being sincere, as always.

“Yeah, I love you,” Jihoon says. It gets easier and easier to say it each time, and by now it slips easily off his tongue.

Soonyoung’s eyes curl into crescents as he beams at Jihoon. “I love you too, Jihoonie!” He looks down and back up, steeling himself to add, “You know I meant everything I said yesterday, right? I think you’re extraordinary.”

He wets his lips and nods slowly. “I think the same of you,” he says, and in those few words he hopes Soonyoung can feel how much he means it.

The slightest traces of pink creep up Soonyoung’s ears, and Jihoon delights in the lovely blush pink hue.  _ Peonies,  _ he thinks.  _ Peony pink, all of him, from head to toe. _

It’s true. Soonyoung is pink all over – not literally – in the sense that he is all soft and pure and warm. He’s the color of glowing sunrises and lip tint and Jihoon’s favorite flower. 

“Soonyoung. Will you go out with me?”

His eyes widen fractionally and he hesitates before nodding overenthusiastically. A smile spreads across his pink lips and he’s practically exuding happiness. “Yes, of course,” he answers shyly, all soft and sweet.

 

Jihoon and Soonyoung go out to the cafe they’d gone to before on the two “not-dates,” and they head back to Soonyoung’s apartment when they’re both pink-cheeked and giddy from flirting and holding hands in the snowy streets.

Needless to say, Jihoon wakes up to seventeen annoyed texts from Seungkwan and an arm slung over his waist.

 

It turns out that after all Jihoon didn’t need any of the cliche pick-up lines or cheesy flirting. He doesn’t need any meet-cutes or overtold love stories. All he needs is the boy clinging to his side, snoring softly, the boy he’d fallen for despite every hurdle life had thrown at him, despite his aversion to love, despite everything that told him it was impossible.

 

\- x -

 

It’s another normal Sunday for Lee Jihoon.

The crocuses greet his boyfriend cheerfully as he bustles in, leaning in to kiss Jihoon’s cheek and wave hello to Seungkwan, who promptly squeaks, “No PDA in my presence!”

“Good morning, Soonie,” Jihoon says quietly, smiling at his boyfriend of two months. “How are Wonwoo and Junhui?”

Soonyoung is back from visiting his former roommate and his boyfriend in their new apartment and helping them move in. With Wonwoo gone, Soonyoung had immediately asked Jihoon to move in with him, and of course, Jihoon had agreed. The two couples were often together on Friday nights and weekends, sometimes going out on double dates, sometimes just loitering in the shop.

“They send their love,” Soonyoung says breezily. “And they want to adopt a cat already.”

“I literally saw them yesterday but okay,” Jihoon says. “Wait, does their apartment even allow pets?”

Soonyoung laughs brightly. “Nope, but knowing them, they’ll smuggle in a cat.”

“Definitely,” Jihoon nods, shoulders relaxing when Soonyoung’s arms wrap around his torso from behind.

Distantly, he can hear Seungkwan bemoan his own pitiful love life, but Jihoon lets Soonyoung tuck his chin into the curve where the skin of his neck meets his shoulder, and it’s more interesting to focus on Soonyoung’s cheek nuzzling his own.

“Love you,” Soonyoung murmurs.

“Love you more,” Jihoon says back, turning to wrinkle his nose at Soonyoung. 

His boyfriend laughs against his skin, hot breaths brushing against the side of his neck. “Impossible,” he declares. He then steps back and kisses his cheek again, making to leave.

Jihoon whines, “Don’t leave, you can just stay here all day. And cuddle me.”

“You know I’d love to, Jihoonie, but I’ve got to visit my mom. And anyway, Seungkwan looks like he’s going to throw up.”

“Suck it up, Seungkwan,” Jihoon says, irritated. “One more kiss.”

Soonyoung obliges and plants a peck on his lips, bidding a final goodbye as he jogs out. “Have a wonderful day, Jihoonie! I’ll pick you up for lunch.”

“Tell your mom I hope she’s feeling better,” Jihoon tells Soonyoung, eyes fond. “Love you.”

His boyfriend makes kissy noises on his way out, and Jihoon sighs when he’s left alone with Seungkwan again.

“When I suggested that you get a boyfriend, hyung,” Seungkwan begins with distaste. “I didn’t think you’d be this touchy. In  _ my  _ presence.”

“When I very politely shot down your suggestion, Seungkwan,” Jihoon says. “I didn’t think I’d fall in love. Ever. And here we are.”

The younger boy softens and fiddles with the hem of his apron. “You really love him, huh?”

“I adore Soonyoung,” he says simply. “He’s the light of my life.”

“I can tell,” Seungkwan laughs. “It’s cute. I complain a lot, but I’m really happy for you. You guys deserve each other.”

“Thanks,” Jihoon says, turning to face Seungkwan. “I’m really happy for us too. We made each other go through a lot of shit to be together.”

 

Yeah. They’ve been through a lot.

And Jihoon wouldn’t trade a single moment of it, would never trade a single moment of loving Soonyoung. He never will.

“Guess that just makes our relationship stronger,” Jihoon shrugs. “I’m never letting him go.”

**Author's Note:**

> hello!  
> with this monstrosity i end my accidental three month hiatus lol,, i really meant to write and post during winter break but somehow i got roped into using my time to play mario kart and make twenty+ prompts of just soonhoon rip  
> this fic... i thought of it during a class and scribbled it down on a piece of paper and from that i created my first work that is not only over 5k, but over 10k. wow. i'm so sorry you had to read 10k of this.  
> anyway i hope you like it because it really took a lot out of me to write more than short au prompts,,  
> also i'd like to add: SEVENTEEN'S COMEBACK!! god home is so so good and it makes me feel so warm when i listen to it,, and i really love good to me ksjdfns tell me your favorite tracks!! stream home :)
> 
> also as u probably know by now i cannot for my life write chaptered fics so i made sure to finish writing this before i posted... as for under my umbrella... i highly doubt i'll be able to finish it, but i might not delete it yet?? not sure ksjnas
> 
> thank you so much for reading! i would really appreciate it if you left kudos/comments because i am a weak soul who lives off the validation from other people. love u


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